Ed Abuse
by Tnelson711
Summary: Sarah abuses Ed, but Ed doesn't mind. But what does Ed get out of it...? REVIEW! New Policy for fanfictions: If you favorite it, then you have to review it. Okay? Rated T for mild language, violence, and death. Dark ending removed due to bad reaction. XP
1. Terrible, horrible, no good, bad day

Ed Abuse

A Fanfiction by Tfiction

Rated PG for some violence, extremely mild language, and Plank. (JUST KIDDING! DON'T KILL ME, JONNY! :D)

Chapter 1 – A terrible, horrible, no good, bad day for Ed

"ED" screeched Sarah.

"Coming baby sister," said our lovable oaf, Ed. He ran to Sarah's room, wondering what she wanted. When he got up there, Sarah was holding a milk bottle (apparently empty) and one of her dollies. "Polly Poo-Poo needs to be fed," Sarah said. "Please feed her some milk, big brother."

"Can do, Sarah," Ed said, taking the bottle and Polly Poo-Poo from Sarah. He put the bottle in her mouth and started to "feed her" the milk. Once he was done, he pat the doll on the back, and listened. No burp. He shrugged, and handed the doll and the still empty bottle to Sarah.

"Thank you, Ed," Sarah said so sarcastically, that a normal kid, even a normal five year old would notice it. But Ed was not a normal kid.

"You're welcome," Ed said out of politeness, before leaving the room. As he left, he was thinking about today's events, as well as buttered toast. _Sarah sure needed help, and Big Brother Ed was there to help her._

_**But does Sarah help Big Brother Ed back?**_, said a voice in Ed's head.

Ed perked up at the new voice. He did not recognize it._ Who are you, and why have you come to steal Ed's tub of gravy?!_ Ed thought to the voice.

_**I have not come for your tub of gravy. We enjoy it together, **_said the voice.

Ed realized this must be myself. _Hello, Ed. My name is Ed._

_**Ed, you notice how many times that baby sister Sarah tells you to do stuff?**_

_No._

_**Well, I have. Today is Sunday, and this week, Sarah told you to do stuff fourteen times, including today.**_

_Like what?_

_**Buying her and her persnickety friend fudge, cleaning your room, when its not that messy-**_

_Double Dee says so, Other Ed._

_**...and even having you feed Polly Poo-Poo.**_

Ed gasped. _You're a spy?_

_**A spy? Where? ....you lie. Anyway, I am your mind, so you're talking to yourself, so I was there.**_

_So, what does this mean?_

_**Back to my point. The point is, Sarah is a big girl. She is not a baby anymore.**_

At hearing the word Baby, Ed remembered when Sarah was a little girl. _Good times, huh Other Ed?_

_**Yes, good times. For her, at least. But you do it for free.**_

_For free?_

_**Yes, for free. She doesn't do any favors in return.**_

As Ed was thinking with himself, he did not notice that he was sitting outside._ Go on, Other Ed._

_**Do you really know why you do this stuff for her **_**for free?**

_Why?_

_**Because she will tell your mom.**_

_Don't tell mom! I'll do anything!_

_**SEE?! This is what I'm talking about. She constantly abuses you and makes you do work to get what she wants, and threatens to tell Mom if she doesn't get what she wants from you.**_

_She does?_

_**She does. She also tells you to give stuff that you took, or she will tell Mom. But half the time, she doesn't even have proof that you took it. In fact, I have suspicions that it was Jimmy to took one of her dollies and put it in her room to get you grounded.**_

_Okay, Other Ed...._

_**And what does she give you? Any quarters? A Jawbreaker? Buttered toast? Even a hug?**_

Ed thought for a minute. He admitted through thought, _No..._

_**There's also another person who abuses you.**_

_Who?_

_**Eddy.**_

_Eddy's the man with the plan!_

_**Yes, but he's just that. Does he do any work?**_

_....no...?_

_**Who does all the work in the scams?**_

_Me?_

_**Not just you. Double D as well.**_

_Double D?_

_**Yes. He just sits around, and waits for the customers, while you get supplies and Double D makes the invention and sign. Does he do any work at all?!? NO!**_

_Umm.... okay.  
_

_**So you should stand up! Let Sarah and Eddy do things themselves for once! At least tell them what I've told you.**_

_Okay-_

_**Shut up! This has nothing to do with Gravy!**_

_See you, Other Ed, _Ed thought to Other Ed. _Say hello to the chickens in my brain!_

_**You can say hello to them. They're your chickens, too.**_

_Oh. Hello chickens in my brain!_

"Wake up, Monobrow!" Eddy shouted.

Ed snapped out of his thoughts about the Sarah problem, and said, in an unusually unhappy tone, "Coming, Eddy!"

Eddy was thinking Ed was distracted, which is easy for a moron. Edd, however, was worrying, because Ed was acting unusually strange. "Ed, is something the matter?"

"Gravy.." Ed sorrowfully, but idiotically, said.

"Well," said an unmoved Eddy. "Ed's okay."

Edd was about to comment on Eddy's uncaring reaction, but then realized the joke, and kept quiet.

Eddy began shouting, "Ed's Ping Pong table! For a measly quarter for each player, you and a buddy can play Ping Pong! Whether it be two on two or one on one, you will enjoy this exciting game."

Suddenly, what appeared to be a stand with no one in line, with Eddy holding an empty jar, became a busy stand, with almost everyone in line, with Eddy holding a jar full of quarters. Soon enough, everyone was caught in at least one game of Ping Pong.

The only one not enjoying this was Ed.

"ED!" shouted the voice of a very familiar voice. Sarah had arrived at the scene.

"ED!" boomed Sarah's voice again, holding a plate. "Get up, Stupid. I'd like you to make me a sandwich. Turkey and provolone, hold the mayonnaise. Got it, Stupid?"

On a normal day, Ed would have complied, no questions asked. But on this particular day, Ed was not in a good mood. He had had a chat with himself. Actually, with his nagging side reminding him how much Sarah was asking him to do this. Being constantly abused by Sarah, forced to do what she says under the threat of Sarah telling Mom, Ed had agreed with himself that enough was enough.

"Ed?" Sarah's voice was rising, and suddenly, she became more dangerous. Ed still hadn't answered.

"No, baby sister," Ed finally said.

* * *

Dramatic Ending to the first chapter. Sarah's finally going to get hers! W00T! Anyway, Review!  
...yes, I used one of HyperInuyasha's jokes in "Trapped in a Mansion" and its sequel. But it's funny! :D


	2. Heck No, Baby Sister!

Ed Abuse

Chapter 2 – Heck No, Baby Sister

* * *

Previously

"_ED!" shouted the voice of a very familiar voice. Sarah had arrived at the scene._

"_ED!" boomed Sarah's voice again, holding a plate. "Get up, Stupid. I'd like you to make me a sandwich. Turkey and provolone, hold the mayonnaise. Got it, Stupid?"_

_On a normal day, Ed would have complied, no questions asked. But on this particular day, Ed was not in a good mood. He had had a chat with himself. Actually, with his nagging side reminding him how much Sarah was asking him to do this. Being constantly abused by Sarah, forced to do what she says under the threat of Sarah telling Mom, Ed had agreed with himself that enough was enough._

"_Ed?" Sarah's voice was rising, and suddenly, she became more dangerous. Ed still hadn't answered._

"_No, baby sister," Ed finally said._

Sarah looked confused. "What did you say?"

"I said NO, baby sister," growled Ed. "Are your ears broken?"

Eddy, who just heard Ed growl at his sister, looked at Ed, who was in a bad mood. He looked at his customers in line. He thought, _Should I keep making money, or close down the scam for a bit?_

"....I'm closing down Ed's Ping Pong Table for a bit," said Eddy, putting up a sign that said just that, then turned to Edd. "Check it out, Sockhead! Ed's busting a gut!" Eddy snickered.

"Hardly, Eddy," Edd sighed.

"Ed," said Sarah menacingly. "did you just say no?"  
"Yes," said Ed. "You do it yourself, Sarah."

"ED!" screamed Sarah, making the others want to listen in on this argument. Usually by this time, Ed would be on his knees, begging for mercy. But not this time. "I'm asking you to help your little sister! Why aren't you helping her?!"

"BECAUSE YOU'RE A BIG GIRL NOW, SARAH!" Ed shouted back.

This made Edd worried, made Eddy make a big smile, struck fear into the others (except Jonny and Plank), and Kevin snicker a bit.

"Jeepers.."

"Dude..."

"Right on! Never a dull day with Ed, huh Plank?"  
"Choice!"

Ed ignored the others, and continued on his rant. "You are a big girl, so do things yourself, but NO! Big Brother has to help little sister!"

"Ed-" began Sarah.

"SHUSH! You torment me! EVERY DAY! Ed is like an angel, caring for his sister, but to Ed, Sarah is like Hades and the Devil in Hell!"

Sarah grew angrier when he said that last word. "I'M TELLING MOM THAT YOU SAID A SWEAR WORD!"

"Not quite," said Edd, excited about having heard that as well. "I think he meant that word as in Heaven and Heck." His voice grew from exited to bored, "Or it could be from one of his comic books,"

"You go, Lumpy! You finally getting the picture!" Eddy shouted with a grin.

Ed turned to Eddy. "You torment me too!"

Eddy's smile faded. "Uh, Monobrow?"

"I help out with your schemes all the time! But who does the inventing?! DOUBLE D!"

Edd smiled.

"WHO BRINGS SUPPLIES AND MAKES THE SIGNS?! ME! BUT WHO DOES ALL THE WORK?! Me and Double D! Eddy is the just the man with the plan!" Ed put emphasis on the word _just_.

Eddy grinned. "Of course I am."

"But you do nothing! We do everything! BAD EDDY!"

Eddy's grin faded.

"WHEN EACH SCAM IS A FAILURE, YOU BLAME ME AND DOUBLE D! IT'S AS MUCH YOUR FAULT AS IT IS OURS! YOU ALSO CALL ME NAMES."

"Of course I call you names. I call you Ed-"  
"BAD NAMES! YOU CALL ME LUMPY! YOU CALL ME MONOBROW! AND YOU EVEN CALL ME STUPID!!!!" By now, Ed's face was apple red.

"Check it out," Kevin laughed. "Dorky's busting an artery!"  
Ed turned away from Eddy to look at Kevin. Angrily. Keven stopped laughing, and stopped smiling.

"YOU DEMON!"

"What?"

"You are as evil and cold-blooded as the Diabolical Drawers of Doomsday, by Daniel A." Ed shouted.

"What did I do?" Kevin asked.

"YOU BEAT ME UP WHEN IT'S NOT ACTUALLY MY FAULT! YOU MAKE FUN OF US! YOU CALL US _DORKS!_"

Kevin gulped.

While Ed was busy with Kevin, Sarah tried to sneak away to tell her mom, but accidentally stepped on a squeaky bone. Ed looked at Sarah. "I HAVEN'T FORGOTTEN ABOUT YOU, YOU DEVIL!"

Sarah was silent. Ed continued, "YOU ABUSE ME EVERY WEEK OF THE DAY!"

"Um, Ed, that's 'day of the week'," Edd corrected.

"YOU MAKE ME DO STUFF YOU CAN DO YOURSELF! SOME OF THIS STUFF I DON'T LIKE! YOU FORCE ME TO BUY YOU AND YOUR PERSNICKETY FRIEND FUDGE, MAKING ME CLEAN MY ROOM, WHEN IT'S NOT THAT MESSY-"

"Actually, it is disgusting, but not that messy," Edd said.

"...AND EVEN MAKING ME FEED A DOLL!"

With every word Sarah processed, fear struck her heart. She was about to speak out, but Ed continued.

"I DO ALL THESE NICE THINGS FOR YOU, BUT WHAT DO I GET?! NOTHING! NOT EVEN A HUG! I GET PUNISHED AND YELLED AT FOR WHEN YOU MISPLACE YOUR DOLLIES!"

"But how-"

"YOU GET AWAY WITH IT BECAUSE YOU THREATEN TO TELL MOM!"

Sarah had enough with being yelled at. "I'M TELLING MOM BECAUSE YOU YELLED AT ME!" Sarah screamed, but if you listened closely, you could notice a hint of fear.

Ed growled, "Maybe you deserved to be yelled at. If you do tell Mom, tell her how much you torment me!" With that over with, he went into the house. Since the ping-pong table was near the front of the table, he went through it, destroying it in the process. "I want to be alone!"

SLAM!

"Jeez," said Eddy, before opening up the scam again. He saw angry customers. "What?"

By the end of the day, Eddy got pounded again, his money regrettably refunded. Why was the scam a failure, when the customers liked it? Ed ruined it, AGAIN. When he walked through the table, it was destroyed. With no ping pong table, the kids wanted their money back. Edd tried to avoid being pummeled by saying they would build a new table, but it was too late by them.

Later that day, Sarah thought about what Ed said. _Maybe, just maybe..._ Sarah thought. _I might have deserved that yelling._

That night, Sarah decided against telling Mom about the lecture. As she went into dream land...

* * *

Whoa nelly! I wouldn't want to get Ed that mad. Sarah got the blade of the sword Ed used against her. W00T! COMEUPPANCE FOR SARAH! Anyway, review!

...yes, I'm well aware that I don't usually use bad words in any of my works. But this time, it's an exception. Edd explained why in this story.


	3. Parental Abuse

Ed Abuse

Chapter 3 – Parental Abuse

* * *

Previously

_By the end of the day, Eddy got pounded again, his money regrettably refunded. Why was the scam a failure, when the customers liked it? Ed ruined it, AGAIN. When he walked through the table, it was destroyed. With no ping pong table, the kids wanted their money back. Edd tried to avoid being pummeled by saying they would build a new table, but it was too late by them._

_Later that day, Sarah thought about what Ed said. _Maybe, just maybe..._ Sarah thought. _I might have deserved that yelling.

_That night, Sarah decided against telling Mom about the lecture. As she went into dream land..._

That Morning. Ten AM

Sarah woke up with a start and a scream. She looked around. "It was just a dream," said Sarah, nervously trying to stay calm. "Just a horrible, realistic nightmare..." She got out of bed, and went into the bathroom to change clothes. As she got out, she was in her normal outfit. She put her nighttime clothes away, and walked downstairs.

At the kitchen table, Sarah spotted her mom making breakfast – Buttered Toast for Ed, Eggs for Sarah, and cereal for both of them. Of course, they both got milk. She also spotted Ed at the table. He still was not happy. She shuddered, then sat down. Ed scooted his chair back. As their mother poured Sarah and Ed the cereal (apparently Chunky Puffs), Ed scowled at Sarah for a minute. He looked down at his cereal. He opened his mouth to scream, so Sarah covered her ears and waited for the yelling.

"CHUNKY PUFFS!" Ed said idiotically, before trying to grab a piece. Unsuccessfully. He tried again unsuccessfully. Then he realized something. "SPOON PLEASE!" He got up, and got a spoon, and saw Sarah looking at him. "NO! You can't have my bowl!"

Sarah rolled her eyes. It would be stinky anyway, so why would she want it?

"Mom," asked Ed.

"Yes, Ed?"

"Two things. One, can I sit at the other table?" He pointed to another table.

"Yes,"

He went over there. "Next, why do I have to sleep in the basement all the time?"

"Because we can't fit you into another room." Mom said nonchalantly.

Ed grimaced. _My mom's not telling me the entire truth._

_**Maybe she doesn't care for you**__, _said the voice in Ed's head.

_That's ridiculous, voice I have never heard before._

_**But true. Do you know what?**_

Ed realized it was other Ed. _Hiya, Other Ed!_

_**...**_

_...OH NO! YOU HAVE COME TO STEAL MY SPONGES IN THE WALL!!!!  
_

_**No. But I think that you're also being abused by your parents.**_

_NO I'M NOT, OTHER ED! MY MOM LOVES ME VERY MUCH!_

_**But who knows? You notice something fishy here?  
**__Holy mackerel!_

_**Ha ha ha... anyway, you notice that Mom always makes you take a bath?**_

_BATH! NOOOOOOOO!_

_**As I was saying, if she truly loved you, she would kiss you good night, and tell you a bedtime story.**_

_Don't worry. I have plenty of bedtime stories. Like Marlene of the Deep._

_**Of course. But if she loved you, she would listen to you.**_

_She would?_

_**Yes. Remember when Sarah misplaced one of her toys, and she blamed you for it?**_

_Yep._

_**You tried to tell mom that you didn't take it?**_

_Yep._

_**But she grounded you for supposedly "lying".**_

_She did?_

_**Yep. And when Sarah took one of your toys, you tried to tell your Dad?  
**__But he didn't punish her, and Big Brother had to sneak it back in my room. Dad just watched TV... hey!_

_**And when you got grounded for supposedly stealing one of Sarah's dollies, and I still think Jimmy did it to frame Ed, you tried to plead innocence...?**_

_But Big Ed got grounded anyway. I see..._

_**In fact, I think its because Mom and Dad love Sarah more than they love you that they do this to you. Heck, they even take away your room and give it to Sarah.**_

As Ed and Other Ed were talking, Ed finished his cereal. He noticed it, so he took his dish and put it in the sink, then walked away. Started to, I mean.

"Ed," asked Mom.  
Ed turned around.

"Don't you want your buttered toast?"

Ed thought for a minute. "No thank you." He then walked downstairs to the basement A.K.A his room.

Sarah saw her chance to tell Mom something. "Mom?"

"Yes, dear?"

"Um... how do I ask this?" Sarah stammered. Her mother raised an eyebrow.

"Why does Ed really have to have the basement?"

Mom sighed. "Do you really want to know?"

Sarah nodded, so Mom bent down. "Before you were born, your room was originally Ed's room. He enjoyed it."

Sarah winced, because she now knew that she lived in Ed's old room. _Ew... I think..._

"But when you were born, there was trouble. We only had two bedrooms. One for me and Dad, and one for Ed. We had no room for another."

Sarah was intrigued.

"We had to make a tough decision. Either we moved, but let Ed be torn away from his friends. That was Dad's idea. My idea was to give Sarah the basement, but I loved you so much."

Sarah blushed.

"So we had to compromise. We wouldn't move, nor would we give you the basement. We had Ed move down into the basement. We knew Ed would whine, so I was prepared."

Sarah looked down.

"But Ed actually enjoyed it. It was amazing how quickly he would adapt. Can you keep a secret?"

Sarah nodded.

"Here's another secret you must keep from Dad," Mom said. She whispered, "We hardly ever used the basement."

Sarah chuckled. "Okay Mom."

Mom smiled, then turned around to do dishes. Sarah went into her room, and saw that one of her dollies was missing She instantly thought out loud, "Ed took it." She raced downstairs and said, "MOM!"

Mom turned around. "Yes dear?"

"My dolly is missing!"

Mom sighed again. "Edward!"

Ed came racing up. "Yes mom?"

"One of Sarah's dollies is missing. Do you have it?"

"I didn't take it!" Ed pleaded.

"Don't do this to me, Ed. Tell me the truth," Mom scolded.

"_I didn't take it!"_ Ed repeated. "It must be under Sarah's bed."

Mom sighed. "This hurts me more than it hurts you. You are to stay in your room for the rest of today unless you either tell me the truth, or we find the dolly in the location you told us."

Ed tried to tell her again, but Mom scowled. Seeing that he can't yell at Sarah in front of Mom, he said quiet enough for Mom to not hear him, but for Sarah to, "Parents torment me too." He then walked into his room. Mom saw his lips move, but couldn't lip-read. She didn't care what he said then, so she walked back to the sink. Sarah, having heard those words, felt twice as bad as yesterday. She decided to look for it herself.

In Sarah's room, Sarah was looking under the bed. She didn't have a flashlight, so she tried feeling for the dolly. She felt something, so she grabbed it, and pulled it out. It was the doll Sarah was missing. She ran downstairs, and showed mom.

"Is that the dolly you lost?"

Sarah nodded.

"Well then..." Mom went to the staircase, and yelled. "Ed, you can come out now!"

No response.

"Hm. He must've not heard me. He'll figure it out," Mom thought out loud.

Later.

At twelve-o-clock, Ed's mom came down to give him lunch, and in doing so, she told him that he could come out now. He reluctantly came out of his room to eat lunch, and stayed out for the rest of the day. Every time Ed passed Sarah, he gave her a frown. Each frown made Sarah feel uneasy.

That night, Sarah was going to bed. She drifted off to Dream Land again....

* * *

I know, Tfiction is cruel. He did not show the nightmare Sarah had. I want to build suspense in this. I promise, I will show the dream in the next chapter, but in doing so, it shall be short. Also, now we know why Ed gets the basement, and Sarah gets a good room. Anyway, REVIEW!


	4. The Dream

Ed Abuse

Chapter 4 – The Dream

* * *

Previously...

_At twelve-o-clock, Ed's mom came down to give him lunch, and in doing so, she told him that he could come out now. He reluctantly came out of his room to eat lunch, and stayed out for the rest of the day. Every time Ed passed Sarah, he gave her a frown. Each frown made Sarah feel uneasy._

_That night, Sarah was going to bed. She drifted off to Dream Land again...._

_Inside Sarah's mindscape, Sarah had her own little world. The whole area was quite similar to that to a fantasy. There was a field of grass and flowers in it, all sweet and chewy. The mountains were majestic and purple, and... (dare I say it) icy and creamy, with fudge on top, resembling that of ice cream. And the river wasn't chocolate, nor was it milk, but rather, it was Orange Juice. This was the Land of the Sweet, watched over by the Princess._

_Of course, we couldn't have a good dream without our main character of it – Princess Sarah. It appeared Princess Sarah was planning a picnic. She invited many of her dollies, Polly Poo-Poo included. Even the Grand Prince's loyal servants, like Sir Yum Yum, were invited as well._

_But who was the Prince? Why, it was Jimmy. (Who else?) Jimmy, in Sarah's mindscape, was a perfectly heroic prince, albeit a small one. Twice hath he saved Princess Sarah from the great evil and egoistic Dragon, named Eddy the Fish-face. Twice hath he defeated the dragon in not a battle like in medieval times, but in a battle of wits._

_So, twas a picnic between the Prince and the Princess, after the defeat of Eddy the Fish-Face, and in which the Prince and the Princess will become the Great King and Queen, right....?_

_Yep. However, even the King and the Queen cannot rule over the author, and since I am the author of this story, I say _BRING ON THE PLOT TWIST OF THE DREAM!

_Suddenly, while the picnic was going on, a tremor occurred. It stopped after a few seconds._

"_Jeepers, Sarah!" quoth the Prince. "What was that all about?"  
"I don't know," said Sarah. "But it wasn't much."  
Suddenly, another tremor occurred. This one was much more powerful. This one was noticable._

"_Aha!" said Prince Jimmy. "Hath that wicked dragon not given up yet!"_

_Suddenly, another tremor occurred, and this one caused a split in the ground right between Sarah and Jimmy, splitting the two apart._

"_JIMMY!" shouted Sarah._

"_SARAAAAHHH!" screamed Jimmy._

_Sarah, caring deeply for Jimmy, went to jump the gap, but the gap was way too big. Therefore, she couldn't jump it._

_As she fell, she noticed that her world was falling apart. The river was turning from Orange... well, orange to blood red. The majestic Ice-Creamy mountains was melting, and the fudge glaciers were spreading all over the land, and the flowers and grass were drying up, becoming nothing._

_Thud._

_Sarah landed on solid ground. She looked around. Around her, everything was black. She looked down. Black. She was standing on nothing, but how was she standing on anything?_

_She saw that her clothes now resembled those of her everyday clothes. She had also lost her tiara._

_She turned around. Ed was there. Extremely peeved off. Sarah gulped._

_Ed started to scream, "__**YOU HAVE BEEN A BAD GIRL, TREATING YOUR BROTHER LIKE DIRT!**__"  
Sarah started to back away._

"_**WHAT WOULD MOM THINK?!?!**__"_

_Sarah started to sweat. When Ed wasn't screaming, she turned and ran. Ran for dear life. Ed saw this trick, and started to chase her.  
Sarah saw a door. A pink door. One that resembled the door to her room. She ran doubly as fast, but Ed ran quicker still._

_She just barely made it to the door, and opened it. She got inside, not caring what a mess was inside it. She slammed the door, causing Ed to hit it._

_Sarah found that she was safe.. for the moment. She carefully locked it. Then, she took a look around._

_Instead of Sarah's normal room, she saw something similar to Ed's room. The wallpaper was not pink; but purple. Instead of a little girl's bed, she saw a Space Shuttle-like big boy bed. And all her dollies were missing. Instead, all of Ed's toys were replacing them. The toys that were not seen were in Sarah's toy chest. All around, she saw movie and/or comic posters._

"_This must be Ed's room..." Sarah thought aloud. "The one Mom told me about..."_

_Suddenly, banging on the door could be heard. "__**GET OUT OF MY ROOM, SARAH!"**_

_Sarah heard Ed's voice. "Oh no..." she whispered._

"_**I SAID GET OUT OF MY ROOM!!!!**__"_

_Sarah started to run out the window. She might get hurt if she jumped out it, but anything's better than getting beat up by Ed. She opened it, and she saw the worst of it. Eternal darkness. Maybe not everything's better than getting beat up._

"_**I! SAID!" **__Ed was in rage now, as he grabbed the door. "__**GET!**__" He pulled it out. "__**OUT!!**__" He barged in with the door. "__**OF MY!!!**__" He got ready to slam the door onto Sarah. Sarah winced. "__**ROOOOOOOOOOOOOOOMMMM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!**__"_

_SLAMMMM!! The door didn't hit Sarah, but it did hit the floor. But it caused a big, cracked hole to appear under Sarah. Who, by the way, realized it, and started falling._

_She fell for quite some time, passing by some of Ed's toys. When she landed, she was in a chair. One that held her hands in a locked position. She tried to get up, but there was absolutely no chance of escaping now. So, she took a look around. On her left was a wall. In front of her was a huge table – one used for courts. On her right was an audience consisting of Eddy, Kevin, Edd, Jonny, Plank (apparently), Nazz, and Rolf. Also in a different chair identical to the one Sarah was in was Ed. But where was Jimmy?_

_She looked up in front. Sitting on that table (in a chair) was Jimmy._

"_JIMMY!" she shouted._

"_Order in the court!" shouted back Jimmy, causing Sarah to silence. "Court is in session. Would the offensive please explain what happened?"_

_The offense, Ed, stood and pointed at Sarah. "This bad girl has treated me like trash, and has abused me for a long time."_

_Jimmy nodded. "Does the defense have anything to say against it?"_

_Sarah tried to speak out, but no words came out._

"_Nothing?" Jimmy inquired. "Very well. Has the jury reached a verdict?"_

_The audience, who was the jury, rose._

_Eddy was the first to speak. "We have, your honor. We find that the defensive_ loudmouhth, Sarah,_ is guilty."_

_Sarah gulped. But she smiled. _Double D is the fairest one. He'll speak out against Ed.

_Edd spoke next. "Sarah needs to pay for her horrendous acts of crime._

So much for that hope.

"_Plank and I agree," said Jonny, who was mad._

"_Dude, you seriously are a bad girl," said Nazz, horrified that she was on the same cheerleading squad as Sarah._

_"Dorkette! See you in prison!" taunted Kevin._

"_Send this she-demon to the depths of the Earth where she belongs by Great Nano's word," said Rolf._

"_Very well," said Jimmy, before raising his mallet. "Sarah, I hereby sentence you to eternal punishment."  
_

"_JIMMY! YOU CAN'T DO THIS!" screamed Sarah. "WE'RE BEST FRIENDS!"_

_"Not anymore," said Jimmy, although this time, the voice was distorted. "I can't be friends with heartless, cold-blodded jerks." He slammed his mallet._

_Suddenly, Sarah was free from the chair, but she was falling. Into complete darkness._

_Thud._

_She landed again. But how was it that she was still moving? She looked down. She was on the model rocket that she had threatened to destroy, but it was much bigger than before. It was also moving like a real rocket. Moving really fast._

_Sarah wanted to scream, but she was out in space, where she couldn't breathe. She tried to hold it in, but couldn't for long, and had to breathe. Surprisingly, she could. Out of amazement, she forgot to hold on to the rocket and fell off right onto the ground._

_As the rocket flew off, Sarah saw a chance to escape. But, she tripped over something. She checked to see what it was. "Just my stupid brother's toy robot," said Sarah._

_Suddenly, its eyes glew blood red, and it started to expand. Soon, it was ten times taller than Ed, and ten times larger. Sarah screamed at the sight of this montrosity._

"_Demonic Life Form. Must destroy," Droned the robot, as it marched, trying to shoot Sarah, and stomp on her._

_Sarah ran for dear life. Fortunately, size does not equal speed, so Sarah was easily able to outrun it. When the robot was out of sight, Sarah did not stop on her own. She ran into something. She sniffed, then held her nose. She had ran right into a giant hunk of cheese. Sheldon. Suddenly, the cheese started to talk._

"_Sarah... Ed has told me to give you a kiss.." said Sheldon._

"_A... kiss?"_

"_Yes..." said Sheldon's crusty voice.. "THE KISS OF DEATH!"_

_Suddenly, Sheldon sprouted lips, and made kissing noises. Sarah, not wanting to know, ran away. She ran far far away._

"_Come... back..." said Sheldon._

_Sarah did not listen, and ran even quicker. When the cheese was out of sight, she looked back. She saw a monster._

"_EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEKKK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" screeched Sarah._

_The monster was also one of Ed's toys – Baron O' Beef Dip. The Baron stomped all over, trying to slash at Sarah. Luckily, gymnastics really payed off for Sarah. She dodged every slash that the Baron could pull. She continued to run until she ran into something. Remember that robot?_

_The robot, seeing its chance, grabbed both of Sarah's arms. Sarah, wanting it to let go, kicked the robot. Not a good choice for Sarah's foot. It hurt her more than it hurt it. As the Baron O' Beef Dip came closer, the monster spoke._

"_**You are a vile and despicable creature that tormented your brother, who is also my master,**__" said the voice of the monster. "__**This is payback for all you have caused him.**__"_

_Baron O' Beef Dip started slashing at Sarah. Sarah could do nothing but wince and scream at the pain. Pretty soon, her chest was open, revealing her internal organs, and where her heart would be; except she didn't have one. Blood spilled all over Sarah's lower body. It felt-_

"_Cold...." Sarah whispered, for it would hurt her more for talking louder. "Jimmy was right.. I really was a heartless, cold-blooded jerk..."_

"_**This hurts me more than it hurts you, Sarah**__," said Baron O' Beef Dip, before pulling back its arm for the stab._

_Sarah waited for the punch to hit her...._

_....it never came....

* * *

_

Okay, I said I might make this chapter short, but I guess I was wrong. Some violence in this one, but not enough to make this a M-rated fanfic. I must be getting good that this.

Hooray for the return of Sheldon! Uh.... Jr. ...I think.

Anyway, REVIEW!!!


	5. Hallucinations of Granduer pt 1

Ed Abuse

Chapter 5 – Hallucinations of Granduer, pt 1: The Morning.

Author's Notes: This story is on Earth to Edd (Come in, Double D!), The3Eds, and this site. A member of The3Eds asked me if I would have Ed yell at anyone else. There's only three more people I would have Ed yell at, and there's no prizes for guessing, but you can make a guess if you want. I'm going to have fun with this chapter. Lots of hallucinating. :D Enjoy.

* * *

Previously...

_Baron O' Beef Dip started slashing at Sarah. Sarah could do nothing but wince and scream at the pain. Pretty soon, her chest was open, revealing her internal organs, and where her heart would be; except she didn't have one. Blood spilled all over Sarah's lower body. It felt-_

"_Cold...." Sarah whispered, for it would hurt her more for talking louder. "Jimmy was right.. I really was a heartless, cold-blooded jerk..."_

"_**This hurts me more than it hurts you, Sarah**__," said Baron O' Beef Dip, before pulling back its arm for the stab._

_Sarah waited for the punch to hit her...._

_....it never came...._

Sarah woke up screaming. She looked around. She was in her own room. In her own clothes. She looked down at herself. She was not harmed at all. But how? How did she actually feel the pain of the slashes, when she wasn't harmed at all?

"Just a dream, Sarah," Sarah tried to convince her. "Just another nightmare."

She got out of bed, and took a look around. She had the same pink wallpaper and blue floor. All her dollies were in place. She still had the bed. Everything was exactly as it was prior to sleeping.

Suddenly, she saw her whole room disappear. Well, not disappear as in being demolished, but disappear as in transiting into a different room. She saw all her dollies disappear, and change into Ed's toys. She saw all of her wallpaper go down, and change into Purple wallpaper. Slowly, her bedroom was changing into Ed's old room.

_"**GET OUT OF MY ROOM, SARAH!!!**" Screamed the voice of Ed._

Sarah winced. But when she opened her eyes again, she was back in her own room. "What the heck just happened?"

Sarah looked around. Nothing had happened. "I must be more sleepy than I thought."

In the kitchen...

Sarah, in her everyday clothes, sat at the table, waiting for breakfast.

"Sarah, dear,"

"Yes, Mom?" asked Sarah.

"Would you tell Ed it's time for breakfast?" asked Mom.

Sarah nodded, then left the table to go to Ed's room. As she walked downstairs, Sarah held her head. "Erg... headache..." Sarah whispered. She shook it off and went to the bottom of the stairs.

"ED!" Sarah screamed.

No response. Seeing that Ed couldn't hear her, she opened the door. Ed was there, watching Fishbowl II from his bed.

"ED!"

Ed snapped to attention. "Yes, baby sister?"

"Breakfast is ready!" she shouted.

As Ed got out of bed, he turned off the TV. She took a look around. Suddenly, she saw darkness. Then, she saw a really angry Ed.

"_**YOU HAVE BEEN A VERY BAD GIRL! WHAT WOULD MOM THINK?!?"**_

_Suddenly, she was running for her life from the robot. It was no use, as the robot caught her. Baron O' Beef Dip started slashing at her._

"_Heartless... Cold-Blooded... Jerk..." Jimmy's voice said with each stab._

_When Baron O' Beef Dip started to stab Sarah knew life was over for her.._

"SARAH!" shouted Ed.

Sarah opened her eyes. "Huh? What?" She looked around. She was still in Ed's room, completely unharmed. Ed was about to try CPR on her in a way he knew how.

Just when his lips were about to contact with Sarah's, Ed realized that Sarah was alive. He let go, then continued to walk up the stairs. Sarah held her head. "What is going on?"

Later that day, Sarah had finished breakfast, and was waiting outside for Jimmy. She had booked today for a playdate at her own house.

"Where is Jimmy?" Sarah asked to no one in particular.

"Here I am, silly!" said Jimmy, jumping in front of Sarah.

"AAH!" Sarah shrieked, surprised at Jimmy's act.

"Oh! Sorry, Sarah!" apologized Jimmy.

"That's okay, you silly-nilly. I... was caught by surprise, that's all," said Sarah. "Ready Jimmy?"

"Yep, Sarah!"

As the two little kids entered Sarah's room, Sarah started to hallucinate again. This time, the whole room was exactly like in her dream.

_Voices in Sarah's head said "Guilty, guilty, guilty..". Sarah tried to cover her ears, but the voices were too much. Jimmy turned around. Sarah tried to said something to Jimmy, but nothing came out._

"_I cannot be friends with a heartless, cold-blooded jerk like you, Sarah..." said Jimmy with a distorted voice._

_Suddenly, Sarah felt twice as bad as before. She heard voices. Voices from Eddy, Edd, and Jimmy._

"_Horrendous acts... Horrendous acts... pay...." said Edd's voice._

"_Loudmouth... Sarah... guilty...." said Eddy's voice._

_Those words hurt Sarah. But not as much as Jimmy's words._

"_Heartless... cold-blooded... jerk..." said Jimmy's voice._

_Suddenly, Sarah was falling. Into complete nothingness. She could only watch as Jimmy stared at her._

"_Goodbye.. jerk..."_

_Sarah screamed, as it was the only thing she could do now..._

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHH!" screamed Sarah, still hallucinating.

"Sarah!" Jimmy said while shaking her awake. "Are you okay?

Sarah looked around. "I think so."

"What was that all about?"

Sarah shrugged. She got out Polly Poo-Poo, and Jimmy brought out his two dollies – Mr. Yum Yum the Rabbit, and Yum Yum Jr. the Bear.

"Hey Sarah," said Jimmy.

"Yes Jimmy?"

"Why do you still have Polly Poo-Poo?" Jimmy asked.

Sarah sighed. "This one is special. This was my first dolly I ever had. I have cherished it since."

Jimmy nodded. He went over to the Treasure Chest of Toys, and got out Lego blocks. In no time, he made two tables, an audience stand for the other dollies, and a court table.

Suddenly, Sarah found herself shrinking, and found herself stuck in on of the chairs at one of the tables.

"_This girl has abused me and treated me like trash!" said Ed, who was beside Sarah._

_Sarah tried to speak out, but no words came out._

"_I hereby sentence you to eternal punishment," said Jimmy._

"_JIMMY! YOU CAN'T DO THIS!" Sarah screamed. "WE'RE BEST FRIENDS!"_

"Of course we are, silly!" said Jimmy, trying to wake Sarah up. "What's gotten into you?"

Sarah blinked. She wasn't in the table. She was hallucinating again. She looked at the table and found another voice in her head.

_Heartless.. cold blooded... jerk..._

"Are you okay, Sarah?" Jimmy asked again.

Sarah looked at Jimmy. "Jimmy, can we try again tomorrow?"

Jimmy looked confused, but nevertheless, he nodded. "See you tomorrow," said a merry Jimmy, who skipped out the door.

"Be careful, Jimmy. My Mom had just-" Sarah tried to warn Jimmy, but it was too late.

SLLIP! THUD.

"OWIE, SARAH!"

Sarah shook her head, and sighed. "..washed the floor." She went to help him outside.

Outside, Jimmy was walking home. Sarah went to go inside to... think about stuff. About her nightmare, and what it meant, I mean. She tried to do so, when she ran right into Eddy. She took a second to recover, then shouted, "WATCH WHERE YOU'RE GOING, FISHFACE!"

Suddenly, she heard voices in her head again.

"_Loudmouth... loudmouth... loudmouth.... Guilty! Guilty... guilty...."_

_Sarah covered her ears to stop the noise. But it was no use._

_"Guilty... loudmouth... jerk..."_

"_Pay... crimes... horrendous..."_

_"MAKE IT STOP!" Sarah screamed._

Edd put his hand on Sarah, even though he was risking his condition by doing so. By putting his hand on Sarah, she calmed down a little. When Sarah came to, she saw Edd, and started hugging him.

"HEY!" shouted Eddy. "Let go of Sockhead!"

"Not until Sarah tells me what's wrong, Eddy!" argued Edd.

Eddy groaned.

"It was horrible, Double D!" explained Sarah. "I had a nightmare! A huge one! Two in a row! Visions! EEEEK!"

"Oh boo! Hoo!" said Eddy, laced with sarcasm. "Sarah had a nightmare! How horrible!"

"Eddy!" scolded Edd. "Nightmares can have lasting after-effects! Why, there have been studies that there are correlated assimilations between the dream itself and the real world, if you will."

While Edd explained his theory, Sarah had another hallucination. Without thinking, Sarah grabbed a piece of notebook paper from Edd, grabbed some of her crayons from her pocket, and started drawing Ed's room. She was finished before Edd held his hand on Sarah's shoulder.

"Um, Sarah?" asked Edd. "What are you drawing?"

Sarah came to her senses, and looked at the drawing. It was her interpretation of Ed's Old Room. Without warning, she had another hallucination. She started saying in a monotone fashion, "Old room... not mine... his..."

"Good lord! Sarah's having another hallucination!"

Sarah woke up, started hugging Edd. Then, she smelled something familiar. She looked behind her and saw that Ed had just come outside.

"There you are, Monobrow!" Eddy said, before getting a scowl from Edd. "What do you.. er.. want to do today?"

Ed retained his unhappy face for a minute. Suddenly, he shouted, "We shall sprout angel wings and fight Zombie warriors from the planet Uranus, ruled by the evil king Weegee!"

Edd chuckled. "It seems that Ed's recovering from that outburst the other day. He's acting like himself again."

Eddy raised his eyebrow. "Himself? You mean like a total idiot?"

Another scowl from Edd came Eddy's way.

"Hello, Muffin!" said an all too familiar voice. All three Eds (plus Sarah) turned around.

"KANKERS!" all three Eds shouted.  


* * *

Yep! If you guessed the Kankers, you were right! I hadn't forgot about them. Anyway, can you remember how many hallucinations that Sarah had?

Also, a special event will happen at the end of the next chapter. Until then, REVIEW!


	6. Hallucinations of Granduer pt 2

Ed Abuse

Chapter 6 – Hallucinations of Grander pt 2: A premonition?!?

* * *

Previously

"_Hello, Muffin!" said an all too familiar voice. All three Eds (plus Sarah) turned around._

"_KANKERS!"_

Ed, Edd, Eddy n Sarah were in fear. The Kankers had just arrived, and if they arrive anywhere, then all heck breaks loose. Little did they know that should they mess with Ed on a day like today, they will get the sword. But they're tough, so they might get the handle of the sword instead.

Sarah looked at them. They looked so menacing. She looked at the boys, and guess what she saw in Ed: Fear. _They keep Ed on his toes... _Sarah though. _Those meanies..._

She was rudely interrupted from her thoughts when she heard kissy noises. Coming from the Kankers. Lee had just grabbed hold of Eddy and started putting her lips near his. Marie started getting in front of Edd and started having him backed up towards a wall to make him trapped. May, however, steadily walked towards Ed.

As she walked towards the big lug, Ed was thinking, _Yucky, mushy, kissy, girly GIRLS!_

_**Ones that don't leave you alone?**_

_Hiya Other Ed!_

_**No time! May is advancing! But apparently, that Kanker never leaves you alone. You know why?**_

_Because she has a whopper of a crush on me!_

_**Exactly. But you don't have one back!**_

_Yes I do. Behind me._

_**Not a back back, but you don't love her back.**_

_Oh._

_**Today's the day you show her and the others what Los three Eds think of el Kanker Hermanas!**_

"Hello, Big Ed," said May Kanker, interrupting Ed's thought conversation.

Usually by now, Ed would be paralyzed with fear. But this time, his fear evaporated into anger. Hatred.

"Aw.. is Big Ed feeling sad?" chuckled May in a baby-ish tone. "Here's a kiss to make it feel all better," She made kissy faces to attempt to kiss Ed, despite the fact that he rarely bathes.

Ed shook. Not with excitement, not with fear, but with anger. "No!"

May stopped for a moment, puzzled by the word no. She asked, "What do you mean, big Ed?

"I SAID ENOUGH!"

This caught the attention of everyone (Sarah, Edd, Eddy, Lee, and Marie). Lee and Marie dropped Eddy and Edd for a minute, and started surrounding Ed.

"Ed's a goner," whispered Eddy.

"I'm sure that Ed will pull through," whispered Edd.

As the three Kankers surrounded the lone Ed, Lee sneered, "This'll be fun!"

"LEAVE ME AND MY FRIENDS ALONE!" Ed shouted.

Lee chuckled, and said, "I love a feisty man."

"I MEAN IT!" Ed shouted, growing angrier.

"He's so cute when he's angry," teased Marie. "I love a man like that."

"But does your man love you back!?" Ed questioned.

"I also like a man who asks questions," said May.

Ed snarled in frustration.

"I say on the count of three, we jump him," said Lee. "Ready?"

Suddenly, out of the blue, Ed punched Lee. This caused collective gasps all around the group, as well as a silence. Sarah broke the silence, "ED! MOM SAID NOT TO HIT A GIRL!"

Ed looked at Sarah with a disapproving scowl. "Ones that bully me and my buddies all year?!"

Sarah gulped. Edd began to worry. Eddy was still thinking Ed would be a goner. And Lee had gotten up.

"Hey, tubby!" shouted Lee. "Don't push me around!"

Ed's angry frown turned into a evil smile. "Ironic, considering that you always push us around."

Lee raised an eyebrow. Irony wasn't her strong point.

"But I thought you love your kisses that we provide!" Lee protested.

"GET REAL! We hate them!"

Lee, Marie and May gasped.

"That's right!" Ed continued to rant. "You don't give us any warning, you constantly kiss us at least twice a week, and you don't stop, despite our pleas!!!"

"But Big Ed!" May started to cry. "I thought you loved me!"

"Yeah? You thought so?" Ed screamed. "Well, I don't! Try Double D!"

With those words, May was on the verge of flooding the entire Cul-De-Sac with her tears.

"That's right!" Ed said. "_I don't like you!_"

Suddenly, May started bawling. Like a sixteen-year-old teenage girl, despite the fact that she was still young. This made Marie unhappy, and Lee extremely peeved off.

"HEY!" shouted Lee. "NO ONE MESSES WITH THE KANKERS!"

"Irony again," Ed warned. "And maybe next time, you could be a little NICER! What goes around MUST come around, three-eyes!"

Lee was stunned. There was an eerie silence. Then, Lee and the other Kankers (Including the bawling May)

Following that was a scolding Edd. "Ed, while I'm glad that you stood up to them, don't you think that was a bit malevolent or malicious?"

Ed gave Edd a disapproving scowl. He walked back toward his house and took a look at Sarah.

"ED!!!" began Sarah, but then, she had another hallucination.

_She was surrounded by darkness. She looked behind her, and saw an extremely peeved off Ed._

"_**YOU HAVE BEEN A BAD GIRL, SARAH! WHAT WOULD MOM THINK?!?**__"_

_Suddenly, Ed punched Sarah, and she fell, passing several of Ed's toys while doing so. She became unconscious._

In real life, Sarah actually became unconscious.

"GOOD LORD!" said Edd. "Sarah became unconscious with a hallucination!"

"Okay," said Eddy. "That's enough for me. No scams today, no nothing. I'm going to go to my house and read magazines." He walked off to do just that.

Edd frowned. He picked up the little one and brought her inside, and into her room on her bed.

Later that day, Sarah woke up from her forced sleep, and wondered why she fell unconscious. She shrugged, and went on with the rest of the day.

That night, Sarah fell asleep. During that slumber, she tossed, and she turned. Tossed. Turned.

_Sarah was falling again, once more passing some of Ed's toys._

_Instead of falling into a courtroom, this time, she fell on the ground. A black, nothingness ground. She got up, and checked her surroundings. On her right, nothingness for miles. On her left, nothingness as far as the eye could see. She started walking... (ahem) somewhere. She walked for what seemed like miles, when finally, she tripped on something. _Something smelly, _Sarah observed. She took a look, and saw Ed. On the floor. Not breathing. She checked his temperature. "He's cold...." Sarah whispered. She checked his pulse. Not a beat. "He's..." Sarah had to wipe one of her tears. "...dead."_

_Suddenly, she was bombarded with angry voices._

_Eddy's voice was first. "Sarah, you loudmouthed jerk!"_

"_You've been hot-tempered in the past," shouted Edd's voice. "but this tops everything mean."_

"_Dude," said Nazz's voice. "that is seriously not cool."  
"POPPYCOCK!" shouted Rolf's voice. "She-who's-personality-is-like-a-volcano has murdered the half-witted Ed-boy!"_

"_I DIDN'T KILL HIM!" Shouted Sarah, though no one heard her._

"_Plank lost his normal voice when he heard of this death!" shouted Jonny's voice._

"_The sister of the Dork is dark," taunted Kevin's voice._

_Those voices were harsh on Sarah. But the worst voice of all came from her mother._

"_Sarah," said Sarah's Mom. "You should be punished for your crimes."  
"No..." said Sarah. "MAKE IT STOP! MAKE IT STOP! MAKE IT-"_

THUMP!

Sarah awoke. She heard a noise from outside her dream.

THUMP!

There it was again. She slowly got out of bed, and went to investigate the noise.

THUMP!

It came from downstairs. In... Ed's basement. She slowly walked down each step with fear.

Crreeaakk....

She slowly opened the door to Ed's room. She turned on her flashlight, and saw Ed's room. Nothing happened in it. She expected to see Ed hitting his bed by rolling around on the floor, but when she checked, nothing. She went over there and held her nose for the stence that was Ed. She opened the covers, and saw not Ed, but a note. She scanned it carefully, and thought out loud.

"Ed ran away..."

* * *

DUN DUN DUNNNNNNNNNNNN!

I like these moments. This is the event that shall happen – Ed's going to run away. Expect things to get more and more tense during these next chapters. Can you guess what premonition Sarah had.....?

Also, I'm going to put this on hold for now, to work on a different story, called, "Yu-Gi-Ed!", a crossover between Ed, Edd n Eddy and YuGiOh! This is based off the manga, and I shall include the beginning story (when the main character gets the main item (Sorry, no spoilers! XP)) as well. So, until I start working on this story again, adios!


	7. RUN AWAY!

Ed Abuse

Author's Notes: IIIIIIII'M BACK! I will have misspelling and grammar errors in this chapter in Ed's notes. If you are asking why, then the answer is obvious – this is Ed we're talking about.

* * *

Chapter 7 – RUN AWAY!!!

Sarah read through the note again.

_Deer sarah_

_If u r reading this messege, Eye hav run away. Fahr far away. This is a test to test ur carring._

_If u truly care about big brother ed, then u will find mi urself. Donut tell anyone. Not even Mom or Dad._

_Luv, ed._

Sarah took a good look at the note, not caring about the misspellings. "He's gone... all gone..." Sarah whispered to herself. Despite that the fact of Ed being gone forever would be a dream come true to Sarah, she wasn't very happy. "And... it's all my fault... Oh my god....."

Suddenly, she heard footsteps. Not from the closet, but from upstairs. She listened, and to her surprise, she heard voices. Familiar voices.

"Do you know what's down there, honey?" said the first voice. "Mom.." Sarah silently said to herself.

"I don't know, sugarplum, but whatever's down there, I'll be a monkey's uncle if it's got Ed," said the second voice. "Dad..." Sarah whispered.

"Then once we've checked, I'll go buy a monkey if it's got Ed," said Mom.

"I didn't mean that literally," said Dad.

As the door slowly opened, Sarah winced because of the light. She was still sleepy when she read the note.

"Oh my goodness! Sarah, are you okay?" screamed Sarah's mom, ignoring the fact that the "monster" would hear her.

"I'm fine, Mom."

"Was that you making that noise?" Mom asked.

"No," said Sarah.

"Where's Ed?" asked Mom.

"I... don't know..." lied Sarah. But it was futile, for her Mom took the note out of Sarah's hand. The mother read it carefully, trying to comprehend Ed's spelling ("Heaven knows how Ed won the spelling bee," Mom muttered.).

"Honey," said Sarah's Mom to her husband. "Ed ran away."

"He WHAT!!!" Sarah's Dad screamed. "Well, at least I don't have to be a monkey's uncle now."

"This is serious!" said Mom. "Ed is out there without food or water! HE COULD DIE OUT THERE!"

"Right, sorry," apologized Dad.

"I'm coming too," said Sarah.

"No," said Mom. "It's too dangerous."

Sarah was about to speak back, but the look on Mom's face told her otherwise. She sat down in Ed's bed.

"Good night, Sarah. Sweet dreams," said Sarah's Mom, before leaving with Sarah's Dad to go find Ed. What she didn't know that she was completely wrong.

For as Sarah slept, she had another nightmare. This one was about Ed never forgiving her, and the truth being told to her parents, who sentenced her to eternal suffering.

All because she mistreated Ed...

Whom, by the way, was running. Far, far away.

Ed looked back at his house, spat in the direction of it, then continued running. He ran past Eddy's house, and looked inside. Eddy was sound asleep. Before he slept, Eddy had read one of his own magazines, which he had apparently found in a box under Ed's bed. The same magazine was in the box, and Eddy had a grin on his face. Ed frowned, but said, "Belly is bad. Just like Eddy." He continued running off to who knows where.

He went into the woods to calm himself down. That was his intention for running away – alongside having to test Sarah.

Ed took a look at nature's beauty. "So cool... just like in the movies..."

CRUNCH!

"What was that?" Ed asked out loud, swirling in the direction of the sound.

CRUNCH!

"W-w-who's there?" Ed asked, scared out of his wits. He heard footsteps. But these feet were unfamiliar. Ed did not notice that the footsteps were coming from his back. When he did realize, it was too late.

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

"You hear that?" asked Ed's mom.

"Yup," said Ed's dad.

"That was Ed! Let's go check it out!"

And they did check it out. They saw Ed on the ground, with big bruises (but not too serious), with a wolf sniffing him.

"Go away!" screamed Mom, swatting the wolf. "Go on! Shoo!"

The wolf, being afraid, scampered, leaving Ed behind for his mother to check his injuries. "A whole lot of bruises and bite marks, but nothing too serious. Ed, are you okay?"

Ed weakly looked up, and said, "Gravy..."

"Yup, he's okay," Ed's dad joked, awarding him a scowl from his wife.

Sarah was having trouble sleeping that night.

"No, please, no! I'm sorry I mistreated Ed! I'm sorry for everything! I'M SORRY!" Sarah screamed in her sleep, causing her to wake up. She heard the sound of the door opening, so she decided to investigate.

"Sarah, we're home!" said Mom. "And Ed is safe."

Mom and Dad walked in the door, with an unhappy Ed, who glared at Sarah.

"Ed."

Ed looked at his mother.

"How could you do this to your family?!" said his mom.

"But I-"

"Just go to your room!"

"But-"

"NO BUTS!" screamed his mom.

"Especially not my butt!" joked Ed's dad.

Ed looked down. _How dare they! How dare they punish me for trying to calm down! Don't they know that Ed needs to calm down! HOW DARE THEY!_

"Ed, I didn't mean-"

"It's okay," said Ed. "I will just stay in my room." He went to his room to do just that.

"Oh dear," sighed his mom.

"Mom," asked Sarah. "Is Ed grounded?"

"No, Sarah. I sent him to his room for the rest of tonight. I don't want him to get hurt anymore."

"Oh..." said Sarah. "But Ed thought he was grounded. I see."

The next day, Edd and Eddy went to see Ed, but Ed wouldn't speak to them, except, "No visitors. Ed is grounded." Edd and Eddy had learned from their past mistakes, and didn't even attempt to help them. They tried asking Sarah why he was grounded, but Sarah wouldn't tell them.

That night, everything and everyone was quiet. The crickets were chirping, the moon was gleaming, and Ed was snoring. Oops, did I say everyone was quiet?

Suddenly, like a zombie from his grave, or like a mummy from his sarcophagus, Ed rose. However, he was still asleep. Despite this, he got out of his bed, and went out of his room. Up the stairs, and out the door. Snoring all the way. He was sleepwalking again. Edd and Eddy thought after the two times last summer he did that, he would learn. But apparently, old habits die hard.

As he went out on his search for food, Ed subconsciously thought out his victim. _Jonny... _Ed thought. As he walked onto the street, Ed looked around for the correct house. Yes, despite the fact that when you're asleep, you can't see anything. But he failed to see that _A CAR WAS HEADING RIGHT TOWARDS HIM!!!_ When Ed realized it and awoke, it was far too late.

CRASSSHHHHHHHH!!!!!

Ed was knocked from subconscious to unconscious with the car crash. The car was intact, but Ed was severely damaged.

"Oh no.... Ed..." silently said the driver and his wife – Ed's parents.

* * *

DUN DUN DUNNNNNN! Again!!!!

Ed just got hit by a car! People theorized that Ed would perform suicide, but this is a tragedy fanfic – getting hit by a car is a tragedy. Besides, suicide would make this fanfic M-rated, and I despise making those. Anyway, REVIEW!


	8. Ed's Final Two Days, Day 1

Ed Abuse

Chapter 8 – Ed's final two days: Day 1

* * *

Sarah woke up with a start because of the car crash.

"What was that?" Sarah asked herself. "I hope Ed didn't run away again."

She went outside to investigate, but what she saw needed no explanation.

Ed was hit by a car.

"Oh my god..." Sarah whispered. She ran over to Ed. She felt his body. "He's cold...."

"ALRIGHT, DORKS! WHAT'S THE MEANING OF THIS?!" shouted Kevin, having been woken up as well. As usual, he blamed the "dorks" for this.

Guess what! - Everyone in the cul-de-sac was woken up, and in a matter of minutes, everyone was witnessing Ed out cold, with Sarah comforting him. There was a cold silence in the area.

Jonny broke the silence. "Did Sarah.... finally snap? What do you think, Plank? ....Plank?!"

Sarah realized that everyone blamed her for Ed's death.

"The sister of the dork is dark," Kevin said.

"Dude, that is seriously not cool!" Nazz supported.

"Plank lost his regular voice because of Ed's death!" said Jonny.

This continued for a minute. With each second, Sarah felt worse and worse. "I DIDN'T DO IT!"

"I believe you, Sarah," said Edd.

Sarah looked at Edd.

"I assure you, there is a reasonable explanation for Ed being unconscious," Edd said, checking Ed out. "Aha! He was merely hit by a car."

"OHHHHH!" said the others.

"Plank said that he had a sore throat. That's why his voice was different!" said Jonny in relief.

Sarah looked back at Ed. She checked his pulse. Thankfully, his pulse was still there. "He's still alive," Sarah sighed.

"But not for long.." said Edd.

Sarah ignored the others, and kept comforting Ed. "Please don't die, Ed...." she whispered.

Very soon, the ambulance came to take Ed to the Peach Creek Hospital. Sarah was very reluctant to take Ed, but she let the ambulance take Ed.

The Next Day at the Peach Creek Hospital

Ed's parents had found out from the nurse that Ed was due to expire sometime tomorrow. Word spread around that Ed was going to die, so the cul-de-sacians were going to spend a few final minutes with Ed.

Kevin was up first, much to Ed's displeasure.

"Hey Ed."

Ed turned over to Kevin.

"I'm sorry."

Ed was confused.

"For everything. For beating you up, for being a jerk..."

Ed raised his only eyebrow.

"..for calling you a dork."

Ed smiled.

"If there's a dork in this town, it's Double Dweeb, Eddy, and me. That's all," said Kevin, before leaving the room.

Very soon, Jonny and Plank talked to Ed, with Jonny, of course, talking for Plank.

"Ed, are you okay?" Jonny asked.

Ed nodded.

Jonny held the board up to his ear. "Plank says that he can't stand people dying. But he knows that when people die, they reincarnate into something different. For example, a naturalist died and reincarnated into Plank. So who knows? Maybe I'll hear you in a different body." Jonny got up to let the next person take his/her turn. "Catch you on the rebound, slick!"

Next came Nazz.

"Dude, are you okay?"

Ed shook his head.

"I'm sorry that you got hit by that car. If I had been awake at that time, I would've try to help you." She kissed him on the lips, and said with a tear, "Goodbye, Ed."

Then came Jimmy's turn, and also Rolf. Before Edd and Eddy could come in talk to Ed, Sarah cut in line and went into Ed's healing bed. Ed was still not happy.

"Ed, are you okay?" a very timid Sarah asked, hoping Ed would forgive her.

A scowl dashed that hope.

"I'm sorry that you got hit by that car." By this point, Sarah was next to Ed, putting her hand on his shoulder.

"YOU SHOULD BE!" Ed finally shouted, putting Sarah off the bed.

"Ed, I-"

"YOU HAVE CAUSED EVIL MISCHIEF FOR ED! HOW COULD I TRUST YOU?!"

Sarah was about to speak back, but Ed continued. "ESPECIALLY SINCE YOU LET MY MOM AND DAD FIND ME AND GROUND ME!"

"But Ed, I couldn't do anything. I didn't-"

"LIES, LIES, ALL LIES!" Ed screamed, his anger rising with every word he said. "I CAN NEVER PUT MY TRUST IN YOU AGAIN, YOU BIG MEANIE!"

By now, Sarah was too terrified to speak.

"AND NO 'SORRY' EXCUSE CAN EVER LIFT THE CURSE ON-" Ed shouted, but he never got to finish his sentence. Yelling had tired him out, and shortened the time he had left. The nurse shooed Sarah out of Ed's healing room to let Ed rest.

Later that day, Sarah was about to say good night to her mother. However, she was thinking of something else other than a sincere wishing of a good night's sleep.

"Mom...?" asked Sarah hesitantly.

"Yes dear?" said Mom.

"......I haven't been completely honest with you for a while," admitted Sarah, to Mom's confusion. Sarah was hesitating to tell her mother the truth. ".............all those years, I had a threat to tell on Ed to get what I want."

Mom sighed. "I haven't been completely honest with you either."

Sarah looked at her Mom, surprised.

"I've known about this the whole time."

"Wait, what?" asked Sarah, shocked. "You've known that I used the threat? But how?"

"A mother knows," said Mom

"But why haven't you punished me for it? I could've stopped before Ed got hit by that car."

"I was waiting for Ed to stand up. That would be your punishment." Mom sighed and looked down. "However, the shocking events are more than punishment to you."

"By the way, Mom," said Sarah. "The other day, Ed was yelling at me about me abusing him."

"Then that was your punishment from Ed. He is a big brother, and he had a chance to do that."

Sarah looked down. "Now I'm worried that Ed will never forgive me for the pain that I've given him."

Mom patted Sarah's head. "I have to tell you something I haven't before. Polly Poo-Poo, which was your first dolly, was also my first doll."

"It was? Really?"

"Yes," said Mom. "It was also your grandmother's first dolly, and your great grandmother's first dolly. It was passed down many generations."

Sarah smiled. "So the spirit of my grandmother and my great grandmother lives in Polly Poo-Poo.... that's cool!"

"However, here's advice for forgiveness – give what is most dear to you. For instance," said Mom, holding up Polly Poo-Poo. "Your first doll."

"Wait, what? I have to give up Polly Poo-Poo?"

"It worked when me and dad were at the edge of divorcing," said Mom.

"But how did I receive Polly?" asked Sarah.

"It was a gift from your father. He was going to give it to our first child, but no, the child had to be a boy."

Sarah smiled. "Good night, mom." She got up, and went to her bed to sleep. Again, she had nightmares, but inside, she found a ray of hope.

* * *

OMG, THE ORIGIN OF PLANK! ....or not. XP

Sorry for the short chapter. But now we know a lot of things – The origin of Plank, the origin of Sarah's doll, Polly Poo-Poo, and the origin of Potato Salad (just kidding). Also, Nazz kissed Ed! Eww...

Anyway, as always, Read and REVIEW!


	9. Ed's Final Two Days, Day 2

Ed Abuse

Chapter 9 – Ed's Final Two Days: Day 2

* * *

The Next Day – also Ed's final day.

Everyone had had a turn to visit Ed before he dies. Well, except Edd, Eddy and the Kankers. The Kankers were still upset over Ed breaking May's heart.

It was Edd n Eddy's turn.

"Hey Lumpy!" said Eddy in a quiet tone, to which Ed turned to Eddy. "Eddy!" Ed whispered.

"You'll be alright, Ed," said Edd in a comforting tone.

"I envy you, Lumpy. You get to go all the way to a special heaven where you can swim in the Gravy Lake and hike up the buttered toast mountains and even play with the chickens in the sky!" Eddy's explanation of Ed's heaven made Ed smile.

"Oh please, Eddy. Heaven and heck are just biological locations written in the bible, and-" Edd paused when he saw Ed's sad face, complete with a quivering lip.

"Don't listen to Double D's explanation, Ed. I want you to enjoy Heaven forever. That's an order, got it, Lumpy?"

"O.. okay, Eddy." Ed idiotically whispered. "Can you say that again?"

This received laughs all around. When they were quite finished, they left the room to let Ed live the rest of his life in peace. Unfortunately, that didn't last very long.

"Ed?" Sarah asked.

Ed growled at Sarah. He was still very sore with Sarah.

"I just wanted to say that-"

"Go away, meanie!" Ed whispered.

"But Ed, I just-"

"I said go away, you heartless, cold-blooded jerk," said Ed again.

_Heartless, Cold-Blooded Jerk... No...._

"OH ED! I'M SORRY!" Sarah bawled, having lost her resistance to cry. "I'M SORRY FOR ABUSING YOU! I'M SORRY FOR THREATENING TO TELL MOM! I'M SORRY, OKAY!_**I'M SORRY!!**_"

Ed turned away, recoiling from Sarah's screaming.

"I REALIZE NOW THAT I HAVEN'T BEEN A GOOD SISTER!" Sarah cried, wiping a tear from her eye. "WE COULD HAVE BEEN BUDDIES! LIKE ME AND JIMMY! BUT I HAD TO BE MEAN TO YOU!" Sarah calmed down considerably, but was still flooding the room in tears of depression. "I want you to take this." Sarah placed Polly Poo-Poo in Ed's hands. "It's yours to keep, in hopes that you will forgive me. If not, then I will be fine, but I will never be the same person I was before..." With that out of the way, Sarah proceeded to cry on Ed's jacket, despite the smell.  
Ed looked at Sarah. _Sarah... being nice...._

_**Don't accept the apology gift, Ed. She'll never be nice.**_

_Never...?_

_**Never. She is a demon, waiting to eat your heart.**_

_..._

_**...well? Reject the gift and die already! It's already too late.**_

_..._

_**....Ed?**_

_...No!_

_**Wait what?**_

_Sarah is my lovable, sweet little sister. Nothing, not even your words, can change that._

_**Ed, Sarah's pure evil trapped inside a little girl's body! Just reject-**_

_The only thing I'm going to reject is you, you jerk!_

After that final talk with other Ed, Ed used his remaining strength to pat Sarah on the head. Sarah noticed it, and looked up at Ed.

"...All.... is for...given... baby sister..." Ed weakly whispered.

"Ed...." Sarah cried. "There's still time! I have to save you!"

"You already have, Sarah... you already have..." Ed said. Sarah understood what he meant. His mind was tearing him apart from Sarah, but the apology gift changed it all. Now Ed was back to himself before he died – a caring older brother.

"Oh, Ed...." Sarah smiled.

"Tell the others.... that there was still good.... inside you....." Ed said. He breathed his last breath.... then everything ended. Sarah checked his pulse.

"He's.... dead......... and he forgives me...." Sarah smiled.

At the Peach Creek Graveyard.

Everyone lined up to give Ed a parting card to the afterlife. Ed's body was already placed in the coffin, and everyone was in their best, albeit patchy, suit.

Kevin read his first. "Dear Ed, whatever you do in Heaven, please don't be a dork in there. Sincerely, Kevin." Everyone chuckled at Kevin's statement, while an embarrassed Kevin put his card in.

Next up was Jonny and Plank. " Dear Ed. Lots of Hugs and Kisses from my mom! XOXOXOXOXOXOUOUDUDUDOX. In case you don't know, D stands for Nuts, and U stands for Universe. UNIVERSAL NUTS FOR EVERYONE! Love, Jonny." Jonny put his card in.

Rolf was up next, but it seemed that he didn't have a card. "Dear Ed-boy. Rolf wishes you good luck in the Country of the sky. To take with you to there, Rolf bestows onto you the blanket made from the backsides of Rolf's chickens. From Rolf." Rolf put in the card and the brown/white blanket.

Next up was Nazz. "Hey Ed. Here's hoping you have a great afterlife. Love, Nazz. XO" Nazz put in the card, but not before putting a kiss on it.

"Dear Ed. I know you'll be visiting Heaven, but if you by chance go to heck, give the devil the one-two for me, please. Love, Jimmy." Jimmy put in his card.

Eddy was up next. "Dear Ed. What would we do without you? Well, our scams would be less successful, that's for sure." Laughs all around. "But we'll see what happens. Ed, here's a request. Enjoy Heaven, you big lug. Love, Eddy." In went Eddy's card and apparently a quarter.

Edd was next. "Dear Edward. I'll know you'll thrive in the unknown location in the sky, braving treacherous obstacles that by coincidence come your way. Make us proud, Edward. Sincerely, Eddward (Double D)." In went the...... sticky note.

Finally, it was Sarah's turn. She was hesitant to read her note out loud.

"Dear Ed. Despite all that you went through with you life, I want you to know, that even though sometimes I wished that you would buzz off, I've always cherished you. So has mom, and even dad, and heck, even Grandpa cherished you.

"So Ed, I want you to enjoy your afterlife. Enjoy it to the full extent. Do it, or I'll tell mom...

"Love.... Sarah."

"Awwww..." said the others.

Sarah took a bow, much to the others delight. All except Eddy. "Hey! This isn't a piano recital!"

Sarah went over to Jimmy's side. "Jimmy?"

"Yes Sarah?" asked Jimmy.

"....I have a confession. You know about Ed's outburst this week. You know, before he died?"

"My ears still have an owie, Sarah."

"..." Sarah was hesitant to confess, but she found it in herself to do so. "...it was true in every aspect."

"Really?" asked Jimmy.

"Yep. I really did abuse Ed to get what I want. I really did threaten to tell my Mom if he didn't do so. And I'm sorry that I did that." Sarah looked down, but looked back up when Jimmy said, "But all was forgiven!"

"Huh?"

"I mean, you gave Ed your first dolly! That has got to take a lot of courage and love!" Jimmy squealed.

"Really?" Sarah asked Jimmy excitedly.

"I've never had the courage to lend anyone Mr. Yum-Yum!" explained Jimmy.

"Oh, Jimmy!" Sarah smiled. She embraced a hug from Jimmy. A hug of eternal friendship...

* * *

Ed's dead. However, he's not going to die canonically. I'll make sure of that. :D

Anyway, I just love making references. Especially Star Wars references. :-) But the story is not over yet. I haven't even said "The End" yet. ...I just did, didn't I?

Anyway, review! And stay tuned for a plot twist at the end of the story. I assure you, no Zombies, no vampires, no nothing. :D


	10. All Was Well in your imagination!

Ed Abuse

Chapter (Finale! YAY!!!) 10 – All was well.... in an imagery sort of way.

* * *

As Sarah sat by Ed's grave, she thought, _All was fine with me and Ed... until that fateful day.._

_Sarah as a three-year-old was playing with her dollies (Polly Poo-Poo and Mr. Wootie._

"_Would Mrs. Poo-Poo like some mow tea?" Sarah voiced for Mr. Wootie in as good of a man impression as she could._

"_Why, yes, Mr. Wootie. I would love some more tea."_

_As Sarah was playing with her dollies, she heard footsteps coming from behind her. She turned around and screamed. "EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEK!"_

"_Boo!" playfully shouted an eight-year-old Ed._

"_Ed, you scawed me!"_

"_Sorry, Sarah. I'm just teasing. It's not like I'm actually gonna- BOO!" shouted Ed._

"_EEK! PLEASE DON'T DO THAT!" screamed Sarah.  
_

_"I'm just playing!" said a goofy Ed. He opened his mouth._

"_Ed, please don't do that again! Or I'll... I'll..."  
_

_"You'll what?" asked Ed with a smug grin._

"_I'll tell mom!" Sarah blurted, wiping the smug grin off of Ed's face, replacing it with a gasp. "PLEASE DON'T TELL MOM!"  
_

_Sarah saw not mock-fear in Ed, but pure fear. She decided to test out this theory._

"_Oh Mom!" Sarah shouted._

_Hearing her title being called, the mother came into the room. "Yes dear?" Unbeknowest to either Ed or Sarah, she saw Ed being scared, and Sarah observing the fear. She kept this to herself._

"_I just wanted to say that I wuv you vewy much," said Sarah with a smile on her face._

_Mom smiled. "Thank you, dear," she said, going back into the kitchen._

_From there on out, she saw a plethora of possibilities...._

Sarah wiped a tear off of her eyes. Why did Ed have to die? And so young, as well! They could very well have been buddies. Best buddies...

Edd and Eddy (Eddy first) came bursting out of the candy store, holding luscious, spherical, sweet, sugary, delicious, candied orbs. Orbs that could be named with one word.

"JAWBREAKERS!"

Indeed, Edd and Eddy had profited well from what appeared to be a scam. This particular scam was to sell suits for the funeral of Ed. So technically, they had finally gotten cash over Ed's dead body.

As Edd and Eddy were enjoying their sweet orbs, Edd started to say, "You know, this doesn't feel exactly the same without Ed."

"You're right, Double D," admitted Eddy. "It doesn't feel the same without Lumpy."

"I have a good idea, Eddy. Why don't we buy a Jawbreaker for Ed?" Edd suggested.

"That's stupid, Double D," said Eddy. "He wouldn't be there to eat it."

"I mean to bury in Ed's grave to send to heaven, Eddy," Edd said, scowling.

Eddy was not amused. "No way, Double D!"

"_Do it for Ed, Eddy," _said Edd through clenched teeth. It was now obvious that Edd was not happy.

"Alright alright. Geez."

"So, you still aren't satisfied with today's special, eh Eddy?" mocked the candy store owner, whose name was Tim. Nicknamed Evil Tim due to his pastime.

"It's not for me, Mr. Owner-" Eddy began.

"Uh uh uhhh!" Tim warned. "That's _Super_ Owner to you!"

Eddy chuckled. "The Jawbreaker is not for me. It's for my friend."

"Ed, isn't it? He passed away, didn't he?" inquired Tim.

"I know. But I want to bury it in his grave to send with him to Heaven just for him, alright?"

Tim paused for a moment, and rubbed his chin. Eddy could actually tell that he was actually considering it, unlike last time, where he had brought money he got off of the pen-pal services from his pal in Korea.

"Tell you what, Eddy. I'll give it to you _for free._"

"FOR FREE?!?" Eddy glowed.

"But it has to be for your friend. I've got just the one. Come with me." Tim opened a mini-door for Eddy to follow, which is exactly what he did. Inside his office, he had something in a box. Eddy sniffed. "It smells.... like buttered toast and gravy," Eddy observed, sniffing the air, filled with delicious smells.

"Good nose, lad," congradulated Tim. "That is one of the first in the new scented Jawbreakers. You can smell them before you eat them. Pretty_ sweet, _huh?" Tim chuckled at his joke, which Eddy didn't get at first.

"This just happens to be the first in my store. Coincidentally, it's the buttered toast and gravy flavor," Tim explained.

"Ew, who eats that kind of junk?"

"_People who enjoy this kind of junk, that's who!_" snapped Tim.

"Sorry."

"Anyway, be sure to give it to him yourself at the graveyard. That'll be really special," said Tim with a smile.

"Yes sir, Tim sir!"

"What did I say about my title, Eddy!"

"It says your name on your name tag," argued Eddy. That argument was very convincing.

"...oh."

As Eddy went outside, Edd asked, "Tell me, Eddy. What flavor is it?"

"You smell this?" Eddy put the orb up to Edd's nose.

"Good lord, that smells like something Ed would eat. Buttered toast and gravy!" Edd smiled.

"That's exactly what I'm going to give him."

Suddenly, they both felt a drop on their heads. Then another. Another.

"Summer rains, you can never predict them," Edd said. Apparently, he jynxed it, for just after he said it, it changed from just sprinkling to pouring.

"Aw man, Edd, you did it again!" Eddy complained, before going inside to put the Jawbreaker inside its box before it melted.

At Ed's grave, Sarah was still mourning. "Why did he have to die... It's just not fair...."

Eddy walked up to Sarah. "Hey Sarah." Sarah turned around to see Eddy. _I promise you, Ed. I will let you rest in peace and harmony... even from your friends..._

Eddy walked up to Ed's tombstone. "Sarah, can you please let me bury this Jawbreaker?"

"No, Eddy," Sarah said.

"..what?" asked Eddy.

"I said no! Let Ed rest in peace!" Sarah determinedly said.

"I just want to give Ed a jawbreaker!" Eddy shouted.

"I SAID LET ED REST IN PEACE, YOU FLATHEAD!" Sarah screamed back with tears in her eyes.

"Move out of the way, fishface," Eddy said, pushing Sarah out of the way. But Eddy had not learned from past experiences with Sarah, so naturally, he was in for a pummeling. One like no other, because with Ed's grave being violated, Sarah had no choice but to eliminate Eddy.

She leapt at Eddy, and started to punch him. Eddy had no time to defend himself, so he was vulnerable to Sarah's punishment.

While Eddy was wincing from the pain, Eddy noticed that he had a bloody nose. He looked back up at Sarah. She was raising her hand for a stab at the heart.

"NO, SARAH, NO!"

"THEN LEAVE ED ALONE, YOU HEARTLESS, COLD-BLOODED JERK!" Sarah screamed.

"I JUST WANT TO GIVE ED A JAWBREAKER!"

That sealed his fate. Sarah lunged for the stab.

...it never came.

Eddy woke up with a start, sweating all around. He looked around. He was in his own room, with his own smell. "It was all just a dream."

However, he felt a box in his hand. He put it up. "Maybe not! I'm going to have a jawbreaker!" He opened the box. To his disappointment, it was a fruitcake from Edd. It had a card on it - "Get well, Eddy. From Eddward." On the cake was a label. "Fruitcake."

"Double D and his orderly ways," Eddy muttered. He got up and went outside to see a sunshine. Real sunshine.

Edd and Ed were outside.

"Eddy's alive! Stay back, zombie!" Ed screamed.

"Ed, Eddy's not dead," Edd sighed.

"ED!" Eddy squealed and hugged Ed. Suddenly, he let go. "Ed, are you mad at me for using you in all our scams?"

Ed thought for a moment. "Nope, I'm already taken."

"ED! It is you!" Eddy hugged Ed again.

"It seems that Eddy had a monster of a nightmare," Edd mused.

"Tell you what, Ed. I'll do the rest of the work on the scam," Eddy offered.

"Nope, that's okay. We finished it this morning," Ed said, pointing to a ping-pong table and a complete sign.

"...oh. Tell you what, Lumpy. Next scam, I'll do all the work to let you and Double D take a break. Okay?"

"Eddy, acting hard-working? Why, that's-" Edd chuckled, before being interrupted by Ed.

"Haven't a clue what you said, Eddy!" Ed said, causing chuckles all around.

After they were quite finished, they grouped up again, and put the scam in business. Ed, as if controlled by an all-powerful author, sat down on his doorstep.

Eddy began shouting, "Ed's Ping Pong table! For a measly quarter for each player, you and a buddy can play Ping Pong! Whether it be two on two or one on one, you will enjoy this exciting game."

Suddenly, what appeared to be a stand with no one in line, with Eddy holding an empty jar, became a busy stand, with almost everyone in line, with Eddy holding a jar full of quarters. Soon enough, everyone was caught in at least one game of Ping Pong. Just like in the dream.

Only this time, Ed was smiling his goofy smile. He was happy, like always. Ed was himself again.

All was well.

THE END

* * *

GOTCHA! Hook, Line, and Sucker! YOU'VE BEEN ZINGED! (Starts doing the Underpants dance, before being hit by a brick)  
Okay, now that that's over, then what I mean to say that I've been waiting to zing you since the beginning of this story. I said that Ed was not going to die canonically. What I meant was that Ed would die only in Eddy's mind. XP Bet you didn't see that one coming! :P

However, most of those stories are true. Sarah's first doll really was Polly Poo-Poo. Ed really did live in Sarah's room before Sarah was born. But reincarnation did not make Plank's body. XP

So, I'm glad to say that this story is over. Fin. I had a lot of fun writing this, so I hope you enjoyed Ed Abuse. Hope to see you again.

As always, REVIEW!  
- Tfiction


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